Q: How long does it take to post a pic on social media?
A: the same time it takes for a woman to judge and bring down another
A couple of weeks ago Jools Oliver quite rightly hit back at her critics. Her crime was to post a pic of herself in some trousers… but that was enough to make her the week’s target..
Now I am conscious about my weight and can’t blame pregnancy but the comments that angered me more is where this one picture is taken to be a judgment on her mothering skills
“Shouldn’t you be bonding with you baby instead of worrying about your weight”
Seriously – I don’t have kids but I assume there is a minute in the day of a young baby that mum gets to put the kid down?!
And then the loving mum Victoria Beckham who can do no right by some people tweets a pic of her kissing her daughter and the outrage there!
What saddens me is that now with social media we get insight into women’s lives – successful women who can in 20 words or a picture inspires us, teach us, enlighten us or just entertain us but instead of any celebration we tear them down? Why?
I have worked in HR a long time and in this time many senior leaders are wanting more women in the boardroom and we cheer the programmes and initiatives that will help women develop their careers. So why is it on a so many opportunities we turn our back on the sisterhood and criticise?
This led me to think and take stock. I am in my hardest year of my life so time to take stock of what I need to do and be to keep ahead.
- I need to be slim – but god forbid I am slim too quickly if I have a baby (what the magic timeline.. let’s say 3-6 months after). Oh, but the slim body has to be earned.. I must actually CRAVE chocolate and DEPRIVE myself and beat myself at the gym for this body. Ever noticed how those naturally slim women are known as “bitches” (albeit affectionately sometimes)
- A baby – of course!! I wondered what was missing.. I need a baby.. I must want a baby.. in fact no not just one. I kid you not, a friend has one boy who she adores. Of course she wants a sibling for him but after 5 miscarriages a stranger had the audacity to say to her – “Shame on you for not giving your son a brother or sister!” Now I am angry…
- I need a career – I can’t just be a mum and a house wife as I will not be allowed an opinion about anything – as what would I know?
- I need to be organised to never miss a birthday and have the gift wrapping ability of tiffany’s or all hell WILL break loose
- I need a relationship. If you’re single you are obviously a threat to someone’s man.
- I need to make an effort. No make up (except for make up selfie week) is a sign that I have let go. But remember – even if make up gives you the lift and you do wear it – not at the gym – otherwise you’re in for a barrage of abuse reminding you that it’s hardly the look to go and sweat in!
Okay, I am going to stop . I am depressed.
No wonder men don’t get us and are forever marveling at the mystery of women.. I don’t get us!
No wonder a best-selling book had us as being from a different planet to men!
Isn’t everyone living with their own insecurities? Aren’t female celebs plagued with them too? Of course they want to show a good picture – don’t we all? We get to edit our pics, delete our holiday snaps and retake till we like them but I don’t think the paparazzi give a preview to the celeb in question.
Here’s a thought.. lets cheer each-other on. Lets look at JO to say great, she’s tracking her progress back into pre-pregnancy trousers too and she’s doing ok so maybe I can too.
Let’s look at the TV star just back from maternity leave and say good for her.. it’s only a few hours shift and the baby is with a responsible adult so she’s not left the baby for long but is probably feeling guilty about it herself. Lets look at the celeb with weight fluctuating and not even mention it if the story isn’t about weight. Lets crack on with sorting our shit out before throwing it at others.
And on that note.. I am back to the job boards!